Sunday, March 29, 2020

“Hello darkness my old friend....”



I have been having a hard time in lockdown.  Oh! I’m definitely used to being at home now, learning all sorts new that now fill the free time I have since I went in long term disability over a year ago - the difference between dress pajamas, handing groceries/”Silkwood” showers whenever coming in contact with another human being outside your little bubble of a world- is a whole new kind of mindgame.  My fight and flight instincts have kicked in HARD, and I have had a complete shorted circuit meltdown that is preventing me doing anything, any thing  that would make this easier for me to bear.  Interesting ¿coincidence? that the Kickstarter CD, “The Sound of Silence “ by Jeremy Arndt, I funded a while back, just happened to show up in the mail, about the same time we were figuring out when we were going to go to campus to pack up Connor’s stuff for him to finish out his freshman year of Uni at home

 I feel like I’ve been using this time to figure out the tipping point of when forgoing taking a shower is considered “budget-friendly” vs. “I’ve lost-all-the-fux”.  Still, and I really don’t know what it is in the back of my brain, there is that THING that insists I get up every time I think I can’t handle one more punch in the gut, one more crappy diagnosis, one more betrayal of trust. But here I am...back here on Pixie BA’s turf, ...telling the world I haven’t given up just yet. I have to make that one baby step to turn my feet in the direction of moving forward, even if it’s just one tiny step.

  I had the pleasure of befriending Jeremy and his lovely partner Nancy in the yoga teacher training class I took after I finished up my chemo.  They are traveling musicians, artists, yogi, and in my opinions, gurus; sharing their love and wisdom with the wider world.  I haven’t listened to his music in some time.  To tell the truth, I haven’t been in that great of a state of mind to properly appreciate his gift.   His music is truly awe inspiring to me, otherworldly, and bigger than the sum of its parts.  Just what I could use a big old helping of right now, as well as a few others, I imagine.

At this point in time, he and Nancy, like so many of us, are deprived of the ability to go out in the world when they want, but also deprived of the ability to make their living, as it’s based on touring and performing.  I have no doubt that Jeremy and Nancy will use this time to their best abilities and turn a time of uncertainty and fear into something beautiful and inspiring.  That’s just the kind of people, and artists they are. And I want to share that beauty with a world that really needs it.  I want to do them the simple small act of posting a link to their music, their work, to shine a light on them, so that they can keep doing what they’re doing, and to share with my friends out there in the virtual world, that they might feel a little of that beauty in their small part of the world, too. Just in case they need a pick me up or reminder that there is beauty, kindness, community, hope, and, yes, too, all different sounds of silence out there in the world right now.

https://open.spotify.com/artist/7KZzcubMLbaEJMPIHw9Q1T

Jeremyarndt.com



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